Someone asked Premanand Ji Maharaj: my son had a love marriage but after some time due to betrayal in love he committed suicide Guru ji by my sadhana and Bhajan can I try and help The Departed soul from its degradation(How betrayal and illicit affairs affect individuals and families? How to stop this?).
A Mother Seeks Solace After Tragic Loss
Premanand Ji Maharaj Says: yes you can you are a mother chant the holy name if you have companionship you can visit the holy places like you came to vrindavan Dam and and if you have money available then you can freed the birds and animals the people who are sitting on the streets and then by your Bhav offer all the pious credits to God and pray to him that the soul that had come as my son may benefit by this.
And this will help for sure but this is a matter of huge degradation in this case there are some proven methods that can help the key one is restation of shrimad bhagavatam.
if you do a seven Day restation done for his benefit then offer that to the Lord and pray to God that may that Soul benefit by this activity then he will get the pious credits it will be auspicious for him normally it's a matter of huge misery and Misfortune it is considered one of the biggest sins.
Even the law of the land prohibits this if you're trying to commit suicide and someone reports it to the police then the Indian government will put you in jail and you will be punished you can use your body but you don't have the right to destroy it even the government hair will not allow you to do it and God's government will punish you Gravely for this.
Because this human body is divine by it we can become Narayan we can become a demigod by pasas Karma and by sinful conduct we can become a ghost Guru help or become a worm in the gutter and suffer great misery it's up to you.
I have requested many times in these sessions that this trend that has started for the past 30 years or so this boyfriend and girlfriend we had not heard of this before because when I used to go to school there was no such talk people did not have this feeling there was no such feeling at all maybe it happened for the last 35 or 40 years no more since these cell phones came to play this is happening more, because of the misuse of these devices sinful activities are increasing.
Reflecting on Modern Relationships and the Path to True Love
Now you think if someone does not have self-control can he truly love one who cannot control his senses can you truly love it's only a drama that I love you how can you expect anything but betrayal even if the relationship is still on it is still a betrayal you will see later on we were given a human body to live with restraint to serve our parents and with their permission get married and either be a householder or be in the renounced order and obtain God.
But nowadays kids do not consider parents anything they disrespect them many people have shared this with us the reason I discuss this is so that you understand friendship is fine loving someone is not sinful but illicit relationship is sinful.
You should get married to one person commit for Life show the person to your parents and when they approve of your selection then get married and stay with the same person for life regardless of what happens there's no sin in that but until you're married have a pure relationship like friends.
See how Blissful your life will be what kind of character this four days with one person then break up then loving another person then break up and then another and then love another what can we call this think about about it can such a person live another for their entire life can you live with just one person for Life see if you make your tongue taste restaurant food for a few days and then try to feed it homemade food for one month in two days it will get bored and the mind will inspire you get at least some products from outside because you set your tongue loose.
And now how can it live with restraint and be satisfied in one kitchen similarly in life you welcomed illicit relationships now can you live with one husband or one wife please understand this this is why betrayals happen and then in Anger one person kills the other or this sort of thing happens this is today's love marriage today's love love is facing difficulties so that one you love may be happy and sacrificing everything in your entire life for the one you love.
This is love you can love your country you can love God he can love a person by seeing God in them if you love like this you'll be Blissful but for us love is when someone acts according to our will you can see this in society this is not love satisfying the urges of your senses is not love in love you sacrifice yourself.
Those who love the country would say vande mataram happily put the Rope around their neck kiss it and then put it like it's a wedding Garland shame on today's so-call love you betray someone you get them killed Is This Love Don't Be fooled I say make friends I respect your friendship but both of you should stay pure.
Until you decide that we will stay together for life we want to get married then you get married by Sanskaras and live together for life then you can live like householders I don't understand today's dirty behaviors today's kids might consider this to be harsh words and there's a new trend that has started that was discussed live in relationships.
I was introduced the concept by these educated people that if you like you can stay together for one or two months and then you can leave leave the person if you want what kind of joke is this do you think the person is an object where are you taking your life you live with a person for one or two months have an illicit relationship.
Then move on to the next person and then say I don't feel like living with you anymore yes you won't feel like it because you'll be searching for new Pleasures this is how Society is getting destroyed this is a very scary situation I mentioned this many times that the mother and father will be found guilty for this for sure because if you had given the children proper education and not given them so much Freedom that is now ruining you.
Then maybe these sorts of things would not have happened you just taught them about material happiness but you do not teach them about religion you never read the scriptures to them you never taught them proper conduct and because of all of this you are now suffering you just told them to study hard get a job and enjoy and now when the child grows up and has Freedom they may disrespect you to and because they not know better.
They may do these sorts of things like taking drugs having illicit relationships and when the results of these things show up then it'll be too late and now you're crying I think that when you plant a new sapling it is a Gardener's responsibility to nourish it until it becomes a full-fledged plant it is our mistake that insects infected our plants and it's rotted it's our mistake this is the cause in the background even a child in the womb is affected by the parents.
See Abhimanyu learned the art of breaking the chakravyuha view while he was in the move pralad maharaj jii learned about bhakti when he was moved and how do parents behave during pregnancy the parents should be celbrate the parents should be meditating on God the parents should eat Pure Food but this does not happen.
When the child comes into the womb your life should be like an aesthetic for the benefit of the child for him to get the proper Sanskaras Impressions to keep him healthy but do parency zaves have this much capability they eat as they like do what they want and this is a result these Sanskaras influences the child and when he grows up.
They take their full form the seeds you plant in a child will flourish when they grow up for the new generation I pray to you to treat your kids like friends like a friend when they grow up you sit them down and talk to them openly hey we're also your friends if you have some bad thoughts come in your mind then tell us immediately we're here to support you not to harm you not to trouble you.
If he had given the child this much freedom and he revealed something to us then his parents we would think about it whether it's proper or not because he's a child will this spoil him but we did not have these kinds of Sanskaras little kids these days say hey mind your own business this is how they talk to their parents what kind of Sanskaras are these, this is our Indian tradition Lord ragunath, Lord Ram is teaching himself to respect parents by his actions.
Which kids now touch their parents' feet like this okay if you don't touch their feet at least listen to them no culture is left maybe one and thousands of kid would listen to their parents but the environment these days are such that neither girls nor boys listen to the parents and they're both taking the path that leads to sorrow doubts and degradation misery today's love today's relationship how can it be trusted even the husbands and wife don't trust each other kids and parents don't trust each other brothers don't trust each other friends don't trust each other.
What kind of life is this friends would trust each other so much that they would give up their life for each other a husband and wife's relationship would be such they would face all difficulties but stay together for Life parents were considered like God.
This is a religion I am grateful to you all that you've come here and are listening to the words of religion and the scriptures you are doing a favor to me by this it is your mercy if you improve if your thinking changes then my sadna and life will be successful.
That is why regardless of my condition I meet with you to make you understand understand these behaviors will not bring you happiness see when the heart is pure and you meet a companion your heart can immediately commit to them this is is my life partner but if thousands have entered and left our heart then we are used to it our heart will not commit.
It will not commit to one place or one thing understand what I'm indicating what will their life be they tell each other you do whatever you want do I stop you so don't bother me I don't stop you now and then they go their separate ways even though they're living together their minds don't match their activities don't match is this Marride life?
What kind of life is this what happiness will they get you get happiness in affection for example when two friends are together they enjoy the happiness of affection so if the husband and wife are affectionate to each other how happy would they be if the son is affectionate to the parents how much happiness is there the kids say the parents are not affectionate to me.
Then I say how did you grow up they cleaned your poo when you were a baby they bathed you fed you their breast milk raised you so don't doubt their affection we should not doubt their affection we only doubt our affection.
Embracing Spiritual Wisdom for a Fulfilling Life
They have done their Duty with a lot of effort they educated us and when the son gets a good position he considers them to be servants one person had come and told us I'm from a village when I went to see my son who was in a high position he was sitting with his friends he did not get up to touch my feet or greet me and when his friends asked who is this he said my servant he said I returned back right away and said this was a fruit of educating him.
That in front of his friends he called me a servant I will never go to him again if you're educated and your parents are coming get up to greet them touch their feet your good Fort will increase your age will increase your Fame will increase your wealth will increase and you call them your servants what education is this what kind of VIP status is.
That you call your parents servants so now I understand unless you read the scriptures unless you hear spiritual discourses unless you chant unless you take shelter of God then your intelligence will be impure and any activity you do will bring you misery look this person wasted his life what was the goal of his life and what did he end up doing so I think we should improve we should improve our intelligence chant God's name Radha Radha Radha Radha Krishna Krishna Ram Ram.
Whatever name you like and allocate a time to listen to satsang some great Saints have written small books based on the scriptures for example Geet press has books by radha Baba, bhai ji, Jayadayal Goinka ji, Swami ramsukhdas ji there are small books that will help you develop your intelligence your intelligence will be purified and if you have bhagwatam or Ramayan at home then read it for 10 minutes with children the whole house be purified do Naman and house be purified Naam but this does not happen people just talk about mundane.
Things see people schedule these days eating and enjoying till midnight or at 1:00 a.m. and then sleeping till 9 or 10:00 a.m. in the morning then at braham muhurat time which helps you brighten your day and your life you are sleeping how will your intelligence be that is why you all should be careful.
See how this mother is so unhappy I don't want any mother to be unhappy like this may life Lives be supicious may you be thoughtful and select your partner thoughtfully don't destroy your life with such fickle entertainments otherwise you will have to suffer your entire life entire life.
Remember this if at a young age you had illicit relationships then even if you correct yourself later on you will still have to suffer because of the actions you did in the past this is for sure therefore I request you with folded hands have a friendship get married be a householder this is is good but be very careful and give your parents this much Authority that they can make the final decision for you you can put your case forward with stubbornness you were a child but give them the authority to say yes or no.
Try and understand their position see generally parents but I'm not talking about demonic parents generally parents want their children's well-being mothers and parents hearts are like this again not demonic parents as we're hearing these days otherwise even if you swear at your parents their heart will bless you so that no harm comes to you this is how parents are they don't want their kids to be suffered.
This is what I think we have heard of some instances that those who should be nourishing or exporting the children those are people of a corrupted demonic intelligence they're not parents otherwise we should give our parents the right to decide don't ever make this mistake does dying solve anything maybe you were betrayed but another path will open up where you will find love today.
This mother has come but if the son had come at that time he would have found the right path he would have received strength if he don't destroy our body then God will show us a way maybe we would find somebody who loves us even more and make our heart peaceful we should not destroy our life under any circumstance whether we fail in studies lose in sports face a loss in business a friend betrays us we should not give up our life.
If he commits suicide then we will become a ghost and ghosts have to undergo extreme misery you get the body of a ghost therefore never commit this mistake no we can tolerate any sadness we can win any battle never do this whoever can hear me never do this whether you're hearing me here or via SatsangMarg never think of destroying your life never there is a way out this is not the end no God will show you the way just have patience.
We're facing a difficult time and people are abandoning us but if one person catches hold of us then everyone else will lose if you catch hold of God and God catches hold of you no one will be able to oppose you be patient and never think about ending your life respect Elders chant the Holy Name make friends but very thoughtfully elicit relationship is not friendship and friendship does not have elicit Behavior.
Understand it both ways friend is one who removes you from the wrong path and puts you on the path of Truth Now people don't know the path of Truth. Thank You
FAQ: How betrayal and illicit affairs affect individuals and families? How to stop this?
Q: My son committed suicide after experiencing betrayal in his love marriage. Can I help his departed soul through my spiritual practices?
Ans: Yes, you can certainly offer prayers and perform acts of devotion for the benefit of your son's soul. Chanting the holy name, visiting holy places, and performing acts of charity can all contribute to his spiritual well-being.
Q: Is there a specific practice that can aid in the spiritual upliftment of the departed soul?
Ans: Restation of Shrimad Bhagavatam for seven days is considered a powerful method to help elevate the soul of the departed. By offering this recitation to the Lord and praying for the soul's benefit, you can generate pious credits for your son.
Q: How does betrayal and illicit relationships affect individuals and families?
Ans: Betrayal and indulgence in illicit relationships bring immense sorrow and suffering, not just to individuals but also to their families. Such actions lead to spiritual degradation and can result in severe consequences both in this life and the afterlife.
Q: What can be done to prevent such tragedies and foster healthy relationships?
Ans: Embracing spiritual wisdom and adhering to ethical principles can help individuals navigate relationships with integrity and compassion. Encouraging open communication, respecting parental guidance, and fostering genuine affection can cultivate meaningful and lasting relationships.
Q: How can we address the prevalent trends of modern relationships and societal influences?
Ans: By promoting values of respect, commitment, and self-restraint, we can counteract negative influences and steer society towards a more virtuous path. Educating youth about the significance of traditional values and guiding them towards righteous conduct is essential in building a harmonious and fulfilling society.
Q: Is there hope for redemption and healing after experiencing betrayal and loss?
Ans: Yes, there is always hope for redemption and healing, even in the face of profound sorrow and loss. Through sincere repentance, spiritual practices, and the support of loved ones, individuals can find solace and renewal on their journey towards inner peace and spiritual growth.
